Reality sucks.

My research argument paper did not reflect my true potential. I could have worked harder and made stronger arguments to fully analyze my topic. The topic that I chose was a very controversial one and it was much harder to analyze then I originally thought it would be. Although this rough draft wasn’t my best work, I did make some strong points. I believe that I fully explained the argument that I was making about abortion and provided research that was related to my argument. I think that if you read my paper, you would understand what argument I was trying to make. My argument was definitely lacking some research that could have helped make it stronger. I needed to incorporate more sources into my paper, but since I have been having a hard time I didn’t do that. I believe that I analyzed the visual thoroughly and explained why this visual fit with my argument. I believe that the visual that I chose for my research argument paper was perfect for my argument and really helped me argue it. Although there are many visuals that pertain to abortion, I think that I chose the right one for the argument in my paper. I could have relied more on research and used that for more of my argument. I think that I just relied on my knowledge of the subject and did a lot of the arguing. I think that if I put in more research and sources, my argument would have been stronger. Before I turn in my final draft for this paper, I will make sure that I do this right and my sources are perfect for my argument. I regret not trying my hardest and I wish I could say why I have been struggling, but I promise that before this semester is over, I will prove to you that I am worthy of Clemson University. I am sorry for being such a mess and when we meet on Monday during your office hours, I can explain what I am going through. I really hope that you will understand. 

My Paper Assessment

My research paper was definitely a rough draft. It had some points that were outstandingly explained. The argument excelled when explaining and analyzing West African poverty. I was able to do this easily with little reliance on sources and it was easily flowing out of my brain. This section just rolled off with impeccable wording.  The hardest part of my argument was to refute the counter-argument. This was difficult for me because I actually agreed with the argument and had trouble finding flaws in it. Therefore, the counter-argument was a particularly weak part of my argument and had fewer rebuttals than I would have liked in it. Also, the conclusion was awful. I had no direction and couldn’t think of a way to properly summarize my paper. It was by far the least supported and the worst section in my paper. I found the paper hard to write and hit many walls. This was due to the fact that I just couldn’t get the words out the way I wanted to. I feel confident in my analysis of the argument, though it could definitely use some work, which I plan to do as soon as possible. Overall, my opinion of the paper is that it was poor work. I honestly didn’t invest as much time as I should have on it because I figured it would be easy to write and finished quickly. This showed to be the exact opposite when I actually started working on it. With more time investment, the paper has the potential to be a wonderful argument and I will make it so before the final draft. The paper showed little reliance on sources, possibly too little to be honest. This likely impacted the credibility of my paper. The time spent on the paper was definitely impacted by the current happenings between my family and myself. I honestly shouldn’t have let this get in the way of my paper, but it’s hard to separate home life from the rest of your life.

Child Slavery

Overall, there were a lot of things that could have been done to improve my paper. I think one of the most important mistakes that I made when writing this paper was not being able to find sources for the counter view. I searched many sites and articles for the view that child slavery could be considered right, but never came up with anywhere that said so. I found a few lines in one of my sources, but for the most part I supplemented the view with ideas of my own making. I realized that culture and the economy were some very important things to consider and included them. Then, the next issue is that I don’t think that I put enough time into the paper. I researched quite well I think, but did not incorporate these sources as well as I should have into the paper. I had multiple sources in the paper but I think that I focused mainly on one or two instead of spreading the “love” and including more quotes and knowledge from my other sources. When my paper is revised, I plan to include more quotes from the books that I used instead of quotes that come mainly from my scholarly sources. After these things, the structure of my paper could have been done better. I am planning on including subtitles for each paragraph and editing them so that the paper is less boring and flows better. Also, I probably need to include more writing that shows my own thought process instead of that of my sources.

     Even if my paper had some weak points, I think that there is one thing that I did well. I defended the viewpoint that child slavery is bad through testimonies, evidence, and ideas from organizations. I made sure to include enough information from these sources to adequately defend my view that child slavery is bad. 

My Personal Grade Report

           I wrote my research paper on the controversy over the abolishment of the death penalty in the United States. I argued that the death penalty should be abolished based on a number of reasons. The first was because the death penalty has been steadily losing support in the U.S. since the late 1990s. Second, was that the court systems in the U.S. try so hard to give a “fair” trial that the process of law becomes incredibly slow. Third, I argued that the death is not as economically sound as other means of punishment such as life without parole. I also counter argued that the death penalty was not cheaper than life without parole because of the length between a sentenced given and carried out. Throughout the paper I also mentioned the moral side of the death penalty including how killing a person is not justice for the death of another.

           I believe I met the requirements of the paper, but could have gone a little further in my research. I believe I could have gone much further in supporting my argument with statistics and specific examples. I also was short on the required number of words. I think this was connected to the lack of research and will need to improve that for my final draft. Finally of course is my grammar. I always have a problem with grammar in papers. No matter how many times I look over it, I always have at least one run on sentence and comma splice. I will always need to improve my grammar.

           Overall I believe I did well on my paper, but like anything else can be improved in some way. I had positives because I think my arguments were strong and supported my topic quite well. However, my lack of research causes my argument to kind of lose it power. If I were to grade my paper right now, I believe it would be at the B or B+ level.

A look back

For my rhetorical analysis research paper, I chose to do offshore drilling as my topic.  I chose this topic because I feel very strongly about it and felt like I could make a good point about it.  I took a stance that supported offshore drilling.  I took this stance because it is economically helpful.  Without oil drilling, many people will be put out of a job and much economic revenue will be lost.  This point was my main point in my paper.  I used plenty of research for this point, but probably did not explain my argument as well as I should have.  I also talked about the history of oil drilling all together and the history behind the BP oil spill.  For these two points, I did some research but it was mostly me discussing what happened and my viewpoints.  I then went on to talk about the environmental hazards that offshore drilling has.  I talked about the damage and how evolution has created organisms to dissovle (eat) the oil.  I did plenty of research on this and also added my viewpoints and explanations.  Overall, I feel like I did not add enough of my own interpretation.  When I add more explanation in my final draft, my paper will be very strong.  However, my strong points are my research, which I did a lot of.  I worked hard on it and gather both numbers and quotes.  I inserted the quote where I felt like were great spots.  Now, I just have to add interpretations and explanations and my paper will be strong.

Cochlear Clarity

I wrote my research paper about the controversy regarding the implantation of children with the Cochlear implant. The argument against child implantation is the risks and benefits of getting implanted and that a cochlear implant would not help, nor hurt the patient in the long run. I argued that the child should be implanted as soon as possible because there are certain years in a person’s life which are crucial in language and speech development. During this period a child will begin to form sentences and phrases and identify mouth movements with words. I also argued that there are risks involved, but the benefits outweigh the risks and no one should be denied the ability to hear. I think my paper is well constructed and well thought out, but I think while I was researching I was overcome with information. I had a tough time narrowing the information down so I could construct a clear argument.

Another thing I can always work on as a writer is grammar. I have a tendency to add a comma to every sentence. Usually, my commas are used to break up run on sentences. I found while I was looking over my paper that I could always rephrase and fix sentences to make them clear and concise. I also had a hard time reconstructing my thesis to be shorter and clearer so my argument was not lost. I do think that I overcame the challenges in the end, but I think I will have to continue tweaking my rough draft to make it perfect.

There were some areas in my writing that were strong like the order of my paragraphs created a nice flow of ideas, and I incorporated my research in a way that continued my ideas instead of overshadowing them with facts. Even though I am not finished with my work, I think I have a good strong foundation to make adjustments to.

Ways to Clean Up My Paper

Overall, I am satisfied with my research paper on the Stop Online Piracy Act. In my paper, I argue that SOPA is an ineffective way to combat online piracy. The main argument that I made, was that SOPA has a high potential for abuse in that material is unnecessarily censored and that the functionality of the internet would be harmed. The strongest point in my paper was that SOPA harms the functionality of the internet. In this section of my paper, I explain how SOPA could disrupt the online economy. I present my own opinions on the matter and use evidence that shows how SOPA would cause more harm than good.

While this section of my paper was very balanced with discussion and evidence other parts of my paper had too much evidence or not enough. When discussing how SOPA censors content, I relied heavily upon evidence that shows how SOPA censors information. While I discuss this issue, I do not go as in depth as I probably should have. This resulted in there being too much information and not enough discussion. On the other hand in some parts of my paper I began arguments but never provided enough evidence baking up my claims. When discussing the copyright industry I make assumptions about their positions on SOPA without offering enough supporting evidence.

Instead of simply restating another sources argument, I felt that I did an adequate job analyzing sources and presenting my own arguments. While I did need to use sources to give my arguments validity, I relied mostly on my own ideas. In some parts of my essay this is very evident, but in other parts I believe it is less notable. This is because in order to discuss SOPA, I had to explain the different aspects of the bill first. As a result some parts of the paper contain too much information. To fix this, I believe I need to work on integrating information into my paper better so that it is more dispersed. This will help make my own ideas stand out, which will make my paper appear more argumentative.